Shit Kanye says

 

 

Natalie Moses

On June 8, 1977 in Atlanta, Donda and Ray West welcomed baby Kanye. It is widely speculated that shortly thereafter he was unfortunately dropped on his head, thus explaining his more than questionable behavior.

Seriously, just ask Taylor Swift. His success and talent as a producer, rapper, and businessman is widely overlooked due to his public mishaps. For instance, “pulling a Kanye” refers to anything from interrupting someone, to ruining someone’s shining moment, to showing up at an important event completely hammered. Now something else can be added to that list, and that’s a Twitter rampage.

From late at night on Jan. 4 to the wee hours of Jan. 5, Kanye tweeted over 80 times, venting his ideas for a new company and life in general. Though it was nice to see him talking about how celebrities should do something with their fame and fortune to help the world, most of it sounded like it was coming from a maniac on stimulants.

Jumping from subject to subject and making outlandish remarks probably had the wrong effect on the audience. Instead of inspiring, he created just another thing to add to the “pulling a Kanye” manifesto.

Here are a few of the best tweets from Kanye:

  • “They say you only live once, but every time I come to work I feel like I’m starting a second life.”

How many “second lives” can a person have?

  • “I moved to Rome after I left Japan and worked at Fendi for 4 months under cover … I was there to give ideas for the men’s collection”

Secret agent designer?

  • “She said I would always point to the most expensive furs even as a child LOL

… the teachers said I couldn’t focus… I used to get kicked out of class for bringing dirty mags and drawing Nikeys in 4th grade”

Oh, so he’s always been a jerk.

  • “Good logic tells me smile Kanye… the world likes you again… red or blue pill? … aaaaand Swallow lol”

Umm… What?

  • “I appreciate having the most nominations at the Grammies but I feel so conflicted by the fact that award shows sometimes are completely…

…illogical”

Like when you ruin them?

  • “I want to put creatives in a room together with like minds that are all waaaay doper than me”

Round up the creatives.

  • “Sometimes my grammar is wrong but my thinking is right : )”

Define “right.”

  • “Spike Jonze and I want to do a Summer school that tries new forms of cuuriculim”

Like spelling?

  • “We need to take what Michael Jackson felt and Mcqueen and Steve Jobs and we need make things better…”

Maybe he’s not so wrong after all.

  • “I know this is not a very rapper thing to say but I haven’t bought a new car or piece of jewelry in about 2 years…”

How embarrassing!

  • “If I was a shorty, I would love it if my parents went to PHUKET for vacay so I could keep pronouncing it wrong on purpose in front of them.”

Every “shorty’s” dream.

  • “Hard to be humble when you stunting on a jumbotron”

Famous people problems

Contact Natalie Moses at [email protected].