How to get your roommate out when you want to get down

Kelsey Misbrener

Sometimes, it’s hard to get alone time with a significant other in a dorm the size of a closet. Students shared their strategies to get their roommates out.

“I think the bathroom’s on fire.”

-Cody Prelec, freshman aeronautics major

“There’s a party down the hall, so you should go.”

-Nick Dorsey, freshman biotechnology major

“Will you go buy some milk?”

-Sam Heim, freshman English major

“Unfortunately, I’m not getting any ass right now… but I’d just tell her I’m sick.”

-Markeeda Whitthorne, freshman communication studies major

“Just tell them you’re going to have sex then they’ll probably be like, ‘Ok, I should probably leave.’”

-Jessica Rodriguez, freshman pre-nursing major

“Have them run an errand for me, like ‘Hey, can you go to Walmart and get this or that?’”

-Derrick Harris, freshman exploratory major

“I hate to tell you this, girl, but you kind of smell. You might need to take a shower.”

-Sheena Shamblin, freshman exploratory major

“Somebody needs you down the hall…”

-Kirsten Haney, freshman pre-human development family studies major

“Why don’t you have a cig outside … or five.”

-Erin Palivec, freshman visual communication design major

“I would just say, like, ‘get out.’”

-Kahlie Haney, freshman business management major

“All (my roommate) said is text him, and he’ll sleep in the bathroom.”

-David Charles, freshman exploratory major

“If the music’s too loud, just don’t even come in.”

-JC Camargo, freshman technology major

“Two nods.”

-Denalle Glenn, freshman psychology major


Kelsey Misbrener at [email protected].