Opinion: Guy’s girl

 

 

Cassandra Adams

Cassandra Adams

Cassandra Adams is a dual major in English and news and a columnist for the Daily Kent Stater. Contact her at [email protected].

This is the continuation of the column “guys’ girl” which was introduced last week in “Boys like girls, girls like boys” (which can be read here), examining experiences and observations in hanging out with different groups of people. This column focuses on the particular benefits and downfalls of being considered a “guys’ girl.” ?The beginning persuasive factors are that guys are straight up, don’t judge you and like beer, food and sex (don’t we all). But there are drawbacks, too.

Drawbacks:

They can expect you to drink (and eat) as much as them.

If they lean toward the inconsiderate type or just plainly forget, they may be unaware that you’re about half their body weight and no longer can take straight shots like you did freshman year because you’ll end up on the floor or on a bull (don’t ask). Also, eating as much as them can definitely pack on some pounds if you’re not careful.

They might end up liking you.

This one can really suck. But, if you happen to be one of us girls who likes being friends with a potential boyfriend first, it can be great. However, it can be disastrous for the reasons in the next category.

You may end up liking them.

Logically, it’s hard not to sometimes start liking someone that you enjoy spending time with and genuinely care about. If there’s absolutely no attraction, then you’re safe. If there is a possibility, though, there can be some complications. How I see it is that guys live in two worlds. Guy world is the one they spend the majority of their time in, and girl/guy/normal world is where they usually categorize their girlfriends or a potential as existing. For some reason guys think they have to put on the same type of act in front of girls as girls feel they have to put on for guys sometimes. If they cross over completely, you may learn all the secrets they don’t want you to know, which could be dangerous or be seen more valuable as a friend. If both parties are on the same page, both have to seriously ask if the risk is worth it.

They talk about sex and porn and always have this stuff around.

Even for the most comfortable, sexual girl, this can get really awkward when they are passing around a swimsuit calendar of half-naked women like it’s last week’s newspaper. Best advice on this one, stay somewhat quiet, or offer a nice compliment or a joke before redirecting the conversation elsewhere.

Girlfriends.

This is another toughy. When they have a serious girlfriend you can press the pause button somewhat on the friendship. I’m not saying this should happen all the time. And sometimes the girlfriend is just as chill, and everyone can be a group, a big happy Brady Bunch-style family. But a lot of times this doesn’t happen. So kiss your guy friend goodbye for a little (not literally unless you want the girlfriend to punch you) until at least the “honeymoon” stage is over.

They may think you’re hitting on them.

This is a tricky one too, if they don’t know that you’re the type of girl to usually hang out with the guys and are more comfortable sporting a baseball hat than straightening your hair every day, and you ask them to do something – they may think you’re hitting on them. A way to diffuse the situation — unless you are in fact hitting on them, or feeling it out at first — is to try group things first or tell them straight out that you want to keep it only as friends. Honesty is the best policy, in my opinion.

What’s the verdict? Taking it all into consideration, I overall like being one of the guys and want to keep my gold membership to the boy’s club, mainly because we have a lot of the same interests and it’s more comfortable for me. But girlfriends are very important too, because at the end of the day that type of sisterhood will have your back in a way that’s untouchable.