Opinion: The Palin circus keeps on rolling

Kyle McDonald

Kyle McDonald

Kyle McDonald is a magazine journalism major and columnist for the Daily Kent Stater. Contact him at [email protected].

Young entrepreneurs, here’s a financial opportunity you won’t want to miss. Last week, Sarah and Bristol Palin made headlines when it was announced that they were applying to trademark their names. This week, the patent and trademark office denied their applications because they failed to sign the paperwork.

This news is just another example of how Sarah Palin and Co. are nothing more than a publicity-hungry family ready to use any gimmick they can to gain a few more minutes of fame.

After Sarah Palin’s failed attempt to achieve the title of vice president, she had to weigh her options of what to do next. One option would have been to continue a career in politics and finish up her term as an Alaskan governor. After all, she was already being touted as a potential 2012 presidential candidate. Instead, the Palin family is milking the spotlight for all it’s worth.

Rather than finish up her four-year term as governor, Sarah Palin decided to resign after a little over half the term was complete. She then went on to cash in big money for two book deals, become a Fox News commentator, give a few speeches and sign up for a reality-TV show on TLC. Bristol Palin, possibly the most famous teen mom in America, landed her own TV spot on “Dancing with the Stars,” became a born-again virgin, did a horrible public service announcement with that Situation douche from “Jersey Shore” and took after “Momma Grizzly” as a motivational speaker. Most recently, her speech at Washington University on abstinence was canned because of students protesting her “lack of expertise” on the subject. No kidding. If there are two things Bristol Palin knows nothing about, they’re definitely college and keeping her legs closed.

And now there’s this trademark stunt going on. Trademarks are typically used to distinguish goods or services and protect the trademark holder from another source trying to turn a profit on said good or service. While it’s not unusual for celebrities to trademark their name or catchphrase, we don’t usually see politicians doing so. I guess it makes sense for the Palins, as they are more respected by couch potatoes than most politically savvy people.

Essentially, if the Palins manage to trademark their name, they will create a brand for themselves. While this action won’t have any effect on the press covering the family hijinks or Tina Fey parodying Palin on “Saturday Night Live,” it does mean we’ll probably never see the sequel to “Nailin’ Paylin” and that no one can profit from creating gun and Bible wielding Sarah Palin bobble-head dolls.

The Palins have six months to figure out where to sign their trademark applications, so young entrepreneurs, seize the day. If you happen to get that trademark before Sarah Palin, I would sure say, “You betcha,’” to one complimentary maverick bobble-head.