We learned a lot this semester. So our Bursar’s account shows.
But we did learn a lot other than what is learned in classes. For example:
• No matter how much we hear about swine flu, how terrible it sounds and how many hand sanitizers the university installs in its buildings – we just can’t seem to get the dreaded H1N1.
• Crashing parties at the White House will give you everything you ever wanted: lots of attention from the media. Dress uniquely, sweet talk the Secret Service and bring your camera so you can upload your pics to Facebook with the vice president. Luv ya Biden.
• Local mayoral elections can be very old-timey. As opposed to the Old Western-style standoff this year, Kent’s candidates chose to decide the election with a coin toss.
• The Nobel Peace Prize is getting easier to get. Just have an idea for peace? That’s good!
• College Fest attendees learn that their actions will, in fact, follow them as court dates continue on and on and on.
• We are not descendants of chimpanzees. Instead, we come from some strange-looking fella named “Ardi.” Which doesn’t make us feel any better. But we do have one good question: Why was there never an anthropologist-themed Hot Knees dance-off? Hmm?
• The economy looks worse, which makes our classmates look older. That’s right – adults are coming back to school. (Mom called, she wants to sit next to you in Seven Ideas).
• Don’t ever go to another university event as long as you don’t want your face plastered on the side of the building. If you thought your right side was your bad side, how about the front of the rec? We bet that’s really your bad side.
• There are so many study abroad and international students on campus right now, and they probably don’t like the cold, either (so stop Tweeting about it).
• Houses are flammable. All of them.
For those of you graduating this semester, good luck. Hope you learned as much as we did.
The above editorial is the consensus opinion of the Daily Kent Stater editorial staff.