Leave Anna Nicole alone

Jen Steer

More than a week ago, one of my journalism classes was reeling because of the death of former Playboy Playmate Anna Nicole Smith. I had never heard this group talk about the war in Iraq, presidential candidates or Bush’s budget proposal. But, for some reason, celebrity news captivated them. It kind of makes me sad.

A blond, big-boobed semi-celebrity dies and the world stops in its tracks. It’s funny how the world works when it comes to the rich and once-famous. So, why is it that two weeks after Smith’s death, the media has not laid off it? I know, I’m just fueling the fire by writing about it too. But there is a serious problem when there are speculated diagrams of what may have been in Anna Nicole’s fridge in major newspapers. Let it go.

So many news channels (and let’s not even mention networks like E!) are trying to act like Anna Nicole was some kind of royalty to us. Hearing about how she was adored for being able to live the American dream, I can’t help but crack up. If marrying a millionaire who could almost be her great-grandfather is the American dream, then no wonder the world hates us. One report said Smith emulated Marilyn Monroe. Well, if that’s true, she did a pretty crappy job of it. Anna Nicole was little more than a B-List celebrity who stumbled into opportunities that would never make her a real star.

We are not going to stop hearing about this until everyone knows who the father of Anna Nicole’s baby is. There are four possible candidates who have come forward to try to claim the child. Smith’s lawyer and lover Howard K. Stern; her former boyfriend Larry Birkhead; her former bodyguard Alexander Denk and Zsa Zsa Gabor’s husband, Frederic von Anhalt, have all claimed the baby could be theirs. That’s just gross.

And none of the possible fathers seem to understand they would have had to have slept with Smith nine months before the baby was born. This common law of human nature is completely over most of their heads. The bad thing is, none of these ridiculous revelations surprise me.

All I know is I should never have to read the headline, “Anna Nicole Smith’s body embalmed.” People die, but we can’t treat everyone like his or her life was a tragedy in the making. Anna Nicole was just a little on the crazy side. Plus, when a person does excessive amounts of painkillers and TrimSpa, we shouldn’t give them more credit than they deserve.

Jen Steer is a junior broadcast news major and columnist for the Daily Kent Stater. Contact her at [email protected].