COLUMN: Two fish equals one bride

Don Norvell

How fondly I remember my sister’s wedding!

The two families meeting, most of us for the first time. My sister was more cheerful than I’ve ever seen her. The pergola, beautifully decorated, stood before a breathtaking wooded prospect. My soon-to-be brother-in-law smiled nervously as I held a shotgun to his back (just kidding, no weapons were involved).

This is how real people remember weddings. We remember the love and happiness.

Sadly, politicians and career activists are not real people. They do not care about the true meaning of marriage. They only care that the (not necessarily happy) couple went to the courthouse and paid $45 (in Ohio) for a silly piece of paper declaring them to be married.

In Ohio, an annual fishing license costs $19. It seems as though our wise and noble leaders have accessed some divine wisdom to determine that two years worth of fishing is almost as valuable as a lifetime of love and happiness.

I’d like my readers to ask themselves, “Do I really want two fishing licenses?”

Why does the government deem it necessary to govern marriage? Because it always has.

Before William Penn founded Pennsylvania, religion was a guaranteed influence upon government. The Puritans organized their government to be subservient to their faith. The Roman emperors had their own cult to ensure loyalty from the people. The king of England is the head of the Anglican Church. There are innumerable examples of how civil government was merely an arm of the state religion.

The legal institution of marriage is a remnant of the once inseparable relationship between church and state. That piece of paper has no meaning unless it is supported by the deep spiritual bond that two people develop only through unconditional love.

I’d like my homosexual readers to ask themselves, “Do I really want two fishing licenses?”

Nobody needs the government’s permission to share his life with anybody else. If you wish to have a religious ceremony, there are churches that will accommodate you. The Unitarian Church of Baton Rouge has performed homosexual weddings since 1983. The critical point is that each religion must be free to address the issue based upon its own teachings.

Once we establish marriage as a private matter, other aspects of the law greatly simplify. Inheritances would be determined by a person’s will. Income taxes must be replaced by sales taxes. Divorce would become a church matter, not a legal one. Since wedding vows would mean something, divorce would be rare.

Marriage was invented by religion to serve religious goals. Wedding ceremonies celebrate the couple’s love as a blessing from God and as means to better serve Him. The drive-thru weddings performed in San Francisco in 2004 completely missed the point.

The legal institution of marriage has cursed us with Las Vegas weddings, a high divorce rate and activists citing financial concerns as the top reasons to acknowledge homosexual unions.

If marriage is to reclaim its status as a respectable and worthwhile institution, we must reassert its true meaning and liberate it from the corrupting force of politics.

Don Norvell is a physics graduate assistant and a columnist for the Daily Kent Stater. Contact him at [email protected].