Stop! Did you not take the time to realize that this past October 13th was on a Friday? Fool you are, for this indifferent attitude you’ve taken upon yourself. For this event was as uncommon as it was filled with grandeur, as well as a unique blessing bequeathed unto us mortals. It was September of last year in which I realized such an event would be taking place. As a fan of the “Friday the 13th” franchise I realized that this would pave the way for the night of the century, nay, of all of lifetimes intertwined.
But weep no longer! For you may have missed this opportunity to revel in majesty, but I am here to provide you with a taste of that wondrous experience. I’ve taken it upon myself to make a brief overview of my thoughts/feelings about the franchise as a whole, in the format of a tier list. Yes, I could’ve ranked them, but tier lists are amazing so I urge you to shut up (politely). Besides, it’s easier for me to categorize these movies rather than objectively rank them. But enough talk! I’m jumping right in. Also, for my own sanity in describing key details, I’m gonna give you a spoiler warning for most of the movies here. So there.
F-Tier: “Jason Goes to Hell”
Some of these tiers will be occupied by one movie and one movie only. This instance, however, is more damning for the movie I’ve chosen, since this is the lowest possible tier. I’ve chosen the ninth installment as the bearer of this unfortunate title.
“Jason Goes to Hell” is the first movie New Line Cinema made for the franchise, as all prior movies were made by Paramount Pictures. They did not start off strong. This movie gets far too wrapped up in new lore details that typically do a better job at taking away from the concept’s intrigue as opposed to adding to it. Not to mention the fact that Jason himself spends a miniscule amount of time on screen. We’re greeted with an insanely compelling introduction scene, but afterwards we realize the movie has quite little more to offer.
Overall, this movie strips the franchise of all its initial charm that Paramount, even in their worst moments, never seemed to forget. When it isn’t just plain dumb, it’s simply boring. I’m gonna have a hard time revisiting this movie if I ever bother.
D-Tier: “Jason X”
Yet another instance where only one movie occupies a tier. I promise it doesn’t happen that often. While not as bad as “Jason Goes to Hell,” I still don’t find “Jason X” an enjoyable movie experience. On paper, Jason in space sounds like an insanely fun idea, despite removing the possibility of being taken seriously. In practice, however, we were given a slog of a sci-fi film with only a couple of campy moments to save my impression of the overall movie.
There’s pretty much only one interesting kill, being the moment Jason freezes somebody’s head in liquid nitrogen and shatters it against a counter. But this level of creativity is nauseatingly scant, because most of my time watching it was spent waiting for it to end.
It’s not as much of a non-starter and bore as “Jason Goes to Hell,” but I still would not recommend this movie, despite it seeming fun on the surface.
C-Tier: “Friday the 13th” (2009), “Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan” & “Freddy vs. Jason”
We’ve now entered the realm of movies that I’d gladly take part in rewatching, albeit with some minor reservations. All three of the movies I’ve listed here have something that I find gives them merit, but some glaring issue puts them back from feeling quite “right.”
The 2009 remake of “Friday the 13th” was produced by Michael Bay, and while I don’t find it terrible like most pointless remakes, it just doesn’t know why “Friday the 13th” works. What we’re presented here is a fairly decent “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” movie, with hillbilly aesthetics and dark/gruesome deaths. The fact is that “Friday the 13th,” while gruesome, mostly focuses on campy conventions. This fun and playful energy is what the remake lacks.
“Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan” is the eighth and final movie made under Paramount pictures. While I think it keeps hold of the charm of the previous seven, it’s obvious that this is the weakest. Its biggest flaw is that a considerable chunk of time is spent on a boat to Manhattan as opposed to in Manhattan itself. This section of the movie is tolerable but really slow, it’s kind of a dredge when the title of your movie promises a completely different location. Thankfully, once we arrive in Manhattan, we get all the entertaining mayhem such a title promised, but it’s hard not to feel like it all happened too late.
I’d say “Freddy vs. Jason” is the best movie I’ve put under this tier, perhaps because it’s not as much of a slog as these other ones. It’s extremely campy, it’s poorly written in a lot of areas (though not many movies on this list aren’t) but I do find it quite a bit of fun. The only true issue is that this movie is primarily just a “Nightmare on Elm Street” movie with Jason in it, so it sticks out like a sore thumb when overviewing this franchise. Still, it’s worth a watch.
B-Tier: “Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning”
This is the last time a single movie takes up a whole tier, but I find the distinction with this one quite important. Within the fanbase, this is already kind of a hot take. Part V is extremely disliked within the community mostly because of a controversial twist ending, where Jason turns out to be just some guy, with a completely different set of motivations.
I think if you don’t get hung up on the fact that the killer isn’t actually Jason, you can find quite a bit to enjoy in this movie. There are fun and creative kills, the characters are really campy and absurd but I find that very enjoyable, and quite frankly that’s sort of a “Friday the 13th” staple.
Our main character, Tommy, is the first time we have a recurring protagonist, as we saw him as a child in the previous chapter. This makes Part IV, V and VI a sort of trilogy in a way. Even though Part V would obviously be the weakest in this trilogy, I still appreciate it for what it was. Though the final scene, where Tommy is teased to be the next killer, is truly dumb and the choice to retcon it in the next movie was a great decision. Still, this movie gets too much hate.
A-Tier: “Friday the 13th Part II,” “Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood” & “Friday the 13th”
Now I do like all of these movies very much. This tier is populated with movies that I have a strong soft spot for, even though none of them are perfect.
“Friday the 13th” parts I and II both represent an era of the franchise where they still took themselves seriously, and that both adds and subtracts to their own respective experiences. If you want to entrench yourself in lore and a vaguely interesting horror franchise, you might find yourself thinking these parts are your favorites. Even though I’ve put them in the second highest tier, I still think on some days that they could be my favorites. Overall though, I do think their slow pacing and kind of unfocused execution is enough of a reason to deduct some points. But hey, I’m a “Friday the 13th” fan, it’s kind of in my blood to ignore blatant flaws in favor of just having fun with goofy cinema.
“Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood” had the unfortunate task of following up Part VI, so it’s hard not to feel the drop of quality. However, this movie has a lot of new and interesting ideas to add to the franchise! Our protagonist is given supernatural powers, and this leads to a whole new dynamic for our cast to deal with. This then paves the way for an incredibly well done final battle sequence, where Jason can finally battle someone mano a mano. The main issue with the movie is that the pacing prior to this sequence isn’t great, I have to admit. For this reason this movie isn’t able to reach the heights of the next tier, but I still think it’s worth watching.
S-Tier: “Friday the 13th Part III,” “Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter” & “Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives”
Now we’re getting to the great stuff! I’ll be honest, not one of these movies is perfect. In fact, every single one is pretty flawed in a lot of fundamental ways. I still find this sort of realization irrelevant to my enjoyment of the movies, because it’s just a shit-load of dumb fun. The movies I’ve listed here are just that, and they do it phenomenally.
“Friday the 13th Part III” is both the first time Jason dawns the iconic mask, and the first time the franchise starts to dabble in the concept of dumb fun. The mission statement of the movie was to be 3D so we get a plethora of “oh my god they’re poking right through the screen!” shots that give me so much joy every time they appear. The character interactions are especially fun to watch and it feels like the movie is more intent on making something entertaining rather than something scary. Big-time horror fans might have a problem with this but I most assuredly do not.
If Part III introduced the idea of entertainment and dumb fun, Part IV perfected it. Honestly, it’s probably the movie that best balances the lore and intrigue of the franchise with a genuinely fun experience. It doesn’t abandon the horror as much as III did, and with Tom Savini as the makeup artist for this installment, the execution of kills is done more masterfully than ever before. Tommy is the first child protagonist in the franchise and somehow the most formidable yet against Jason, and he provides a rare connection to our lead that wasn’t terribly present in prior movies. Between the tone and the stellar final sequence of the movie, it’s not surprising that Part IV is a big fan favorite.
Now there is one reason why I took so long to admit just how great “Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives” is, and that’s because it has very little gore. It’s honestly the least graphic movie in the franchise and that, to me, seemed like a pretty big setback for a horror film. But the fact is that this movie completely masters entertainment value. Tommy is at his most compelling as a protagonist and provides an actual sense of urgency in the wake of Jason’s return. The action sequences are by far the best executed and most engaging. Even though there is very little gore in the actual movie, it’s hard to not realize just how creative their work-arounds are. This is also the first movie where Jason is straight up superhuman. Most of the prior movies played around with his invincibility and strength but finally we have a movie where they’re just like, “Yup, bullets don’t kill him. And he comes back to life.”
People invested in the serious tones of the early movies likely aren’t big fans of III, IV, and VI. But I find an immense appreciation for both methods applied to the franchise. I have a nightmare of a time trying to discern which method I prefer, and even though I’ve haphazardly displayed a set in stone preference in this article, I admit that I’m still not sure.
But I know for a fact that I’ve invested way too much time and thought into this movie series to not admit that I like them a lot. They’re not high art, most of them have blatant flaws that any film critic would be quick to disparage, even myself at times. But they’re dumb fun! And I get excited every time the Halloween season rolls around so I have an excuse to watch them again. That’s why this past Friday the 13th was so exciting to me. I only ended up watching one of them that night, but the experience was still very rewarding. I’m glad, even now, that this gave me the inspiration to share my love with a wider audience here.
I hope you got some enjoyment out of this. And if you’re a fellow fan of this series and strongly disagree with my picks, you are wrong. My email is [email protected] and I will debate you with the same intensity I would have if my life were on the line. Fight me, I dare you. Anyway, I love you all.
Anthony Morris is an opinion writer. Contact them at [email protected].
