Opinion: I’m not a Femi-Nazi
September 1, 2011
Courtney Kerrigan
Courtney Kerrigan is a senior magazine journalism major and senior enterprise reporter for the Daily Kent Stater. Contact her at [email protected].
This is not an advice column. I’m not here to talk to you about my love life or your love life or give sex advice or relationship advice. I’m 21 years old — what the hell do I know? If I’d had a successful relationship in the first quarter of my life, I’d be married by now.
But it’s come to my attention that some perceptions of women are concocted by men and need to be rebutted with a woman’s mindset.
So relax, because I sincerely don’t care about your love life. However I, just like most 20-something college students, can relate to most of the love-related bullshit that goes on.
Take rejection, for example. Everyone’s witnessed it, been slapped in the face with it, or slapped somebody else with it — whether your cat just stuck its ass in your face, or Columbia rejected your application (which you knew you weren’t getting into, anyway), or the hot piece of booty at the bar said thanks for the drink and moseyed on over to the next person, it’s insulting and discouraging.
But just like the anatomy of the male and female genitals differ, so do the reactions to encounters with the opposite sex, like rejection.
Guys are quick to say, “don’t take rejection personally,” but just how many of those guys — correction — sober guys actually ask girls out these days? Yes, it’s difficult in the 21st century with our obsession with social media, the ever-present confidence (or bitchiness) women exude, or the complete lack of confidence (or balls) guys exude.
Don’t get me wrong, though; I’ve had a few enjoyable but short-lived conversations with some lucky guys who ended up rejecting me, like the guy in the Denver airport. I’m still waiting for your call back, by the way.
But I think there’s something guys need to understand: most girls WILL take it personally. I swear to God, it’s in our genes.
Now, I’m not going to try and tell you how I think guys react to rejection. Despite my observations and conversation with some close friends, I don’t have a clue. But I will offer a semi-ambiguous rundown of how a girl may react. It’s kind of like a recycled process. She’ll say, with her friends of course, “Well, we’ll see what happens.” The following day: “He probably won’t call. Whatever,” but secretly she tells herself he will. And finally, a few days later: “Why the hell hasn’t he called? What asshole takes your number and never calls?”
But no matter who rejects who, the girl will always think it was something she did, or said, or how she looked, so it IS personal. Get used to it. Even if your male coworker (still) makes more money than you, it’s because you’re a woman. It’s a terrible and embarrassing stereotype, but it’s true because it’s an easy out. And even if your cat sticks its ass in your face while your boyfriend pets its head, it’s personal. Or it’s because you’re a woman. Or maybe your cat just hates you.