“The O.C.”

Fox, Thursdays at 9

“The O.C.” is officially dead to me.

It used to have at least five or six quotable lines for every episode; now viewers are lucky to get one funny line every three episodes.

It used to perfectly juggle its large diverse cast of characters, both adult and child. Now Kirsten might as well become a prop in the kitchen instead of a character and Summer and Seth have all the electricity of a wet blanket.

How could the show have become this far gone? The writers must be holding weekly meetings to try and come up with ways to take all the life out of the show, the actors must have lost all faith in the writers and the network doesn’t seem to care.

There are so many ways to save the show. Remind the viewers why they rooted for Summer and Seth for so long. Give Kirsten something to do. Bring Theresa back with her baby. Get Marissa and Seth together. Anything would be better than this mopey bunch doing the same scene 11 times in every episode.

“One Tree Hill”

The WB, Wednesdays at 8

Just a few weeks after that excellent school shooting episode, “One Tree Hill” has returned to its usual level of complete stupidity. As a reviewer I must tell you this is possibly the worst hour of drama on television and you will not for one second believe any of the characters or situations. As a viewer I must tell you that I love every moment of badness more than the best sitcoms of the past 10 years.

I was hoping for some emotional fallout from the shooting in one form or another, but two episodes later the gang is out in a cabin in the woods dealing with their usual problems and acting dirtier than ever.

As an example of just how bad the show is, viewers were treated to Brooke reading a sexy note from Lucas then going into her bedroom and “Brooking” herself. Did the writers really have to come up with that term, because now I can never hear the name Brooke without giggling like a little girl.

Just when you think it can’t get any worse than that, the lead singer of Fall Out Boy (yes, THAT Fall Out Boy) randomly shows up and starts making out shirtless with Peyton, who is only 17 years old. It’s a little cringe-inducing.

And then Haley whines about losing her wedding ring for half the episode; then, when she gets it back, proceeds to take it off at every chance possible. Shouldn’t a wedding ring fit the person wearing it?

But the worst of the worst is that one character might as well become a regular on the opening credits, right between Mouth and the Coach (who is trucked onscreen once every five episodes or so to talk about his dearly departed Camilla). Yes, that’s right, I’m talking about Sunkist. See if you can count how many times “One Tree Hill” hypes the yummy orange beverage an episode, because I counted eight in the last one. Like that will ever work . now if you’ll excuse me . I’m thirsty.

Contact ALL reporter Robert Taylor at [email protected].