Fashion as a guide to USG’s future

Bo Gemmell

Although I know nothing about the Undergraduate Student Government, my good old democratic spirit convinced me to vote Tuesday.

I recognized only one of the 16 portraits listed on FlashLine. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind to vote for that person for her respective position, but what about the other nine positions?

Being equally apathetic – or, more accurately, pathetic – in previous student government elections, I always picked the most attractive candidates for the positions.

And there arose my dilemma. I could either choose the most attractive candidate – a tried and true method from past years – or I could do some research and see what these hardworking, ambitious people represented.

Then I remembered the picture on the front page of the Columbus Dispatch in early January. The historic photo showed all five surviving U.S. presidents standing together in the Oval Office.

From the left stood George H.W. Bush, Barack Obama, George W. Bush, Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter.

George W. Bush still held the presidency at the time, so I guess he organized the cute little get-together. I don’t know, though; I didn’t read the article. Instead, like a well-uninformed citizen, I analyzed the picture to determine how I would rank the presidents in terms of style.

With all political motives aside, I scanned the five to make my decision. Carter obviously ranked worst: He looked like a little boy in his stubby gray suit, pinkish shirt and what appeared to be brown loafers.

After a few more minutes of deliberation, I deemed the younger Bush next worst dressed. His suit was decent, but he didn’t stand out like the next three.

I couldn’t decide who to place next, so I ranked second-best as a draw between Clinton and Obama. Both men looked authoritative in their dark black suits and bold ties. Obama almost won the upper hand based on his reticent white dress shirt, but I docked a point for his goofy posture.

Without a doubt, Daddy Bush won my choice for best-dressed. Something about his black pinstriped suit, relaxed trousers and patterned tie made him stand out.

So I decided to vote for my student senators based on the candidates’ style.

The first two candidates were similarly dressed in argyle sweaters, so I chose Joseph Derkin on a coin toss.

Adam Patterson ran unopposed, but I have to give him props for his flashy black dress shirt with white pinstripes accompanied by a white silk tie.

Brianna Lawhorn’s opponent wore what appeared to be a hoodie. Although well balanced in a navy blue sweater over a light blue blouse, Lawhorn ultimately won my vote based on Quiera Lige’s minor fashion faux pas of wearing a hoodie.

Marie Daher and Jared Smith both showed tremendous promise, but I had to give my vote to Smith on account of his more formal attire.

The final choice proved most difficult. Kevin Papp and Justin Pierce both stepped up with black sport coats, so that ruled out the coatless third candidate. So who got my vote? Papp. Pierce’s tie, although intriguing, was just too busy for my taste.

Bo Gemmell is a junior magazine journalism major and columnist for the Daily Kent Stater. Contact him at [email protected]