Forget the rumors, nice guys finish first

Noelle Pennyman

It is often said that “nice guys finish last” and it’s usually the excuse guys give for treating women cruelly. Guys assume that women want “bad guys,” and we think nice guys are weak.

Whoever put this memo out should be shot. They’ve ruined all chances for the women, including myself, who actually appreciate nice guys.

I can’t speak for everyone, but I know that I would never date a guy who cheats, steals, hits, or just acts stupid for no apparent reason. Why guys think that kind of adolescent behavior is a turn-on remains a mystery to me.

I miss the days (before reality TV and Jerry Springer) when guys would actually say “hello” instead of “what’s good?” Or the days when men would hold open doors and actually ask women out for a date instead of “let’s hang out.”

Simply because I appreciate chivalry doesn’t mean that I am a right-wing housewife wannabe. Yes, this is the twenty first century and yes I am a strong independent woman but that doesn’t mean I don’t deserve being treated like a lady.

Now if you’ve learned anything from my columns, you know that every rule has an exception. It depends on the woman. Some women want nice guys, not door mats. Some women like being in complete control of the relationship while others want equality.

But we all want a man to be a man, not a Neanderthal.

Now for some reason, guys will also have the misconception that ‘nice guy’ means being a wimp, which is not true. The mama’s boys, losers, criers and so forth are not what women want. We want to be protected but in control.

It’s a fine line and can get confusing for the meek and foolish. But one thing will hold true, girls don’t want their hearts to be broken.

For the nice guys who stay true to themselves and find that they can’t get a girl, there’s not always a concrete reason for this dilemma. If you’re in the corner at a stupid frat party, chances are that you’re not going to find your true love among the boobs and booze. If you’re at a place where you wouldn’t want your girlfriend to be, chances are you won’t find one there either.

Location means everything and with any relationship, you have to put yourself out there. A lot of women who are traditional want to be approached. I know that I won’t approach a guy and risk a high school drama scene. I know it’s not fair to the guys, but that’s the way it works, again, depending on the girl.

So those who are cat-calling women from the passenger sides of their friends’ cars thinking that we’ll respond, you’ll be having a very lonely night. But there’s hope for you yet. All you need to do is stop taking advice from your male friends and start listening to those you’re trying to attract: Women.

Noelle Pennyman is a junior public relations major and a columnist for the Daily Kent Stater. Contact her at [email protected].