COLUMN: Seeking a soul mate online

Nedda Pourahmady

Nowadays, online dating sites are creeping out of every corner imaginable. Whether it be a Web site geared towards single adult males and females or simply the younger generation of soul mate seekers, online dating appeals to individuals of all ages.

I must admit that I fell into this online dating mouse trap. In fact, I was lured in by a variety of tantalizing cheeses and ended up being helplessly bound to the evil wrath of a scumbag. I learned the hard way, time and time again, that looks can be extremely misleading.

I signed up for a plethora of dating sites, such as HotorNot.com, BuddyPic.com and even Match.com. Why would I bother to put so much effort into finding a mate online when I could talk to a guy in real life? Well, this was because I had little to no self-confidence at the time and feared the mere thought of confronting a male in real life.

By using the online dating concept, I wouldn’t have to worry about the face-to-face interaction or the embarrassment I’d encounter if I were rejected. Therefore, my online dating adventures began. I would receive hundreds of e-mails and instant messages composed of cheesy pick-up lines and other various tactics to get me interested, such as giving out contact information or bragging about so-called “achievements.”

Looking back at it all, I can hardly believe that I bought into all that trash, actually thinking in my naive little head that those egotistical jerks actually cared about me. Although I have had the opportunity to meet some decent guys through online dating, I would definitely have to say the whole experience has been a waste of time, for the most part.

I understand these sites may boost self-esteem and allow people who aren’t very outgoing to climb their way up the social ladder. But I think it is terrible how they go as far as rating people based solely upon their pictures, and then putting a superficial label on them, like “hot” or “not.” I am starting to realize more and more that these sites have the potential to superficially shatter self-confidence.

I would say online dating is like gambling in Las Vegas. Chances are, you’ll roll the die and find your pair. On the other hand, you may tug on the slot machine’s handle several times, furiously inserting quarters just to find that you lose every chance you get. In my experiences, I was never fortunate enough to hit the jackpot.

Win or lose, the online dating scene can be very addicting. Even colleges have a Web site (Facebook.com) that allows students to search for friends and meet new people in their social networks. Am I saying that the Facebook is pointless and encourages students to partake in online dating? Not entirely. But sites like Facebook and Hot or Not may be encouraging our generation to think about dating solely on a superficial basis.

Whether you date online or offline, look for more then just a pretty face.

Nedda Pourahmady is a junior newspaper journalism major and a columnist for the Daily Kent Stater. Contact her at [email protected]