A message from a veteran in wars of love

Erica Weisburn

Typically, as a columnist, it is expected of me to tease your intellectual minds with something deep. I am supposed to give you insight and expand your opinions. With this being my first column at the Daily Kent Stater, I wanted my article to make an impact on a person’s day. I wanted it to be discussed before classes and maybe even stir up some controversy to make my mark on Kent State. Or at the very least, create the illusion that I am somewhat intelligent.

Debates over abortion, gun control and registration laws for sexual predators would all suffice, but when it came down to writing, my mind drew a blank. So, in a fit of frustration, I decided to try something a little different. I thought of no better way for readers to get a glimpse into my screwy mind than to get personal. After long hesitation, I decided to write about something almost everyone has endured: heartbreak.

Personally, I have shed my share of tears over men who usually did not deserve them. I survived the war, twice, and picked up some valuable knowledge along the way. Fortunately for you, I will share my mind-blowing breakthrough for all to read.

First of all, figuratively speaking, never go into a battle without your armor. The more vulnerable you are, the more susceptible you are to pain. I found that if you expect the worst, you can never be surprised.

Also, trust your instincts without jumping to conclusions. For example, if you think he or she is cheating, you are probably right. However, it is vital to have facts to prevent you from looking like a psychotic fool.

When the battle is finished, pick up your shattered pieces and limp away. Do not stress over things you cannot control. Remember, your happiness is most important and dwelling over the past will only lengthen the time until you are happy again. While the occasional “screw you” or “you suck” may slip in the midst of a temper tantrum, try not to lose sight of your personality. Insults do not look flattering on anyone.

I credit most of my opinions to lessons learned and a few nameless individuals. I have made plenty of mistakes, only some of which I regret. Yet, in the end, I am still standing, a little broken, but alive nonetheless. I have matured drastically over the past few months and I embrace my stupidity. Admitting you are wrong is half the challenge. If history repeats itself, however, you only have yourself to blame. Some may say I am a bitter, single, white female ranting about how men ruined my life. Well, I’m not. I am simply exposing my screwed-up life to help minimize the harm of others.

So kids, what have we learned today? Oh, yes – to love someone with all of your heart is always a risk. Only you have the power to control your happiness. To put it simply, the amount of pain you endure from a broken relationship is primarily up to you. Even so, I consider those who survive the journey without losing their fire either heartless or lucky.

Erica Weisburn is a junior journalism major and a columnist for the Daily Kent Stater. Contact her at [email protected].